They sparkle and shine when the sun is out,
but when the darkness sets in,
their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within."
-- Elizabeth Kubler Ross
So, today (well, yesterday now) was St. Patrick's Day. It is the one day a year where the non-Irish drink Guinness and pretend to be Irish, and the Irish...well, they do that every day. The streets were filled with drunken friends clad in green and glitter. It sounds like fun, yes. But it got me thinking about how we treat ourselves; how we value ourselves and our friends. How we value everything. But before that, a short -- but related -- digression.
Myself, not yet being 19, am not legal in terms of alcohol where I live. So we went downtown for a bit, just to explore and enjoy this unusually nice weather. And on the way back from our excursion, two friends and I had a small brush with death. We were almost hit by a city bus. We had the right of way, and the bus, which had come to a complete stop, suddenly accelerated around a corner, forcing the three of us to literally run out of the way of the speeding bus.
Now, we hadn't been drinking much (it had been a few hours) and thankfully escaped unharmed. But I couldn't help but think of what might have happened if circumstances had changed. What if we had been drinking more? What if we hadn't been so aware of each other's proximity, leaving enough room for each of us to escape the path of the bus? Now, I don't know why the driver did what he/she did, but this may have been a direct result of that day's choices. If one small thing had gone differently, I might not be here right now. And that is terrifying.
The part of this story that almost goaded me the most was that after we dove out of the way, the bus stopped several meters away. It sat there for a moment, with a few dozen other students inside staring out the blue-tinted windows. And then something more astounding happened.
The bus drove away.
We were left alone, shaken, but thankfully unscathed, by the side of the road.
So this brings me back to value. How much do people really care these days? I realize accidents do happen, and perhaps this was one of those freak things. But, as I said, the immediate aftermath of the incident was what affected me most. How could someone just drive away? That is not only inconsiderate, but almost inhumane, in my mind. I think that the well-being of three students (who, by the way, had been on that very bus twice before in those past two hours) is much more important than the timeliness of an already-lacking schedule. But is this way of thinking relative?
Let's go back to drinking. I know I'm living the college/university life, but I can't understand how people can drink and party hard every weekend. How can you be healthy and actually pass classes? How can you feel good about yourself, when you know you need alcohol to do that for you? I mean, a few drinks once in a while is fine. But when you're spending the night wrapped around your toilet twice a week, there has to be something wrong. How can a person not care enough about their own body to do that? I mean, it's a simple enough choice -- drink to such an extent that you're ill....or don't. I know there are other factors; peer pressure, the need to explore, the wanting to feel in control and adult...
But I think this all boils down to one thing.
Respect. Yes, the very same thing your elementary school teachers drilled into your head.
Ok, I'm getting lecture-y. I'll stop that.
It's taken me a while to understand it, but I think I get it now. Especially since I've been studying the environment and ecology. Everything is related. If you don't respect yourself, you don't respect your body, and you don't respect other people. If you throw your beer can out the window, you don't respect yourself, your space, or the other things you share than environment with.
Take a second and think about what "respect" means. It literally means "re-see" -- take a step back, and have another look. Respect is all about scope. I think we all need to take a 'step back' and realize that things aren't static, and we're not set at one magnification.
Respecting ourselves means we need to re-see ourselves at a new level. How about, instead of thinking about how you feel, think about how you feel about you; how others feel about you; how strangers feel about you -- and how all of these things translate into your actions.
Respecting others means we need to re-see them by thinking about how they feel, and how that affects the way they act, and how you act towards them.
Respecting the environment means we need to re-see how we feel about the environment, and how we act within it.
To me, respect doesn't have to be a "spur of the moment" thing. Respect stems from the past. Your past experience is something everyone has a lot of; you have more behind you than you can be sure of in front of you.
Respect is reevaluation.
The bus driver didn't disrespect me by almost running me down. The bus driver did, however, disrespect me by driving away, after reevaluating the situation.
People make mistakes. But people learn from them. Which is why I find it so hard to accept that there is such a lack of respect in today's society. How long has the human race been living and learning; how long have people been alone, been together, been in the environment? And how much experience has been had? Multitudes. And where has all this gone?
We have lost the ability to look back.
In today's world, we rarely ever look back. And if we do, it's the momentary and ever-self-replenishing "Ctrl+Z". It's a do-over we barely think about, a mere function of our computers that our brains seem to have lost the capability to use. We, as modern humans, can't simply hit Ctrl-Z, and go back. We don't have a clipboard, we can't Crtl-C and Ctrl-P.
At one time, we had the ability to use hindsight. The human brain once had a billion times the memory of a computer. Actually, it still does. But do we use it?
That bus driver momentarily couldn't look back. That bus driver couldn't Crtl+Z that near-miss. So, instead of looking back, using the scope and reevaluation of respect to look back at the situation and make a proper judgement, that person drove away.
So, my challenge to you?
Next time you're faced with a decision, whether it be big or small, immediate or lengthened, try to think beyond Ctrl+Z. Try to use respect. Re-see. Change your scope.
If everyone could do this, think about how much better the world would be! How many problems could be solved!
Use a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Find out what it meant to me. Find out what it means to you.
I'll leave you with the Celtic tree of life; remember we're all interconnected.
It's good to be Irish. And alive.
Slainte!
- C
Very very true, and well said.
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